Even though you may not realize it, negotiation is happening around you all the time. Whether you're leading a team or making a simple decision, the strategies used in everyday interactions can apply to high-stakes conversations. Building negotiation literacy is key to becoming more aware and intentional in how you approach any situation.



In my book, I wrote about the Target strategy, and people often comment on how it helped them see negotiation in a new light. The core of the Target strategy revolves around leverage, a critical concept in executive leadership training programs. When you accept that leverage plays a role in every conversation, you unlock another dimension of influence, much like advanced leadership courses teach.

Personal Story: The Target Strategy in Action The characters in the Target strategy are my three daughters, and the picture in my mind captures their ages as they honed this tactic. Today, all three are in their twenties and working professionally, using these same negotiation principles in their careers. They reach out to me whenever they face a formal negotiation situation, advocating for themselves and applying transformative leadership techniques they’ve learned over the years.



Start Early: When my girls were six, eight, and ten, I took them along on my full shopping trips to Target. They were old enough to venture off together, leaving me to focus on my list. They knew my trigger points—nagging never worked. But how could three young girls walk into Target and leave without something in hand? They needed a strategy.

Perfect Timing: They learned early on that timing is everything. They would "happen" to find me just as I was wrapping up my shopping, when I felt I had checked off my list and my stress level was low. They had built what I now call relationship equity, a concept we often teach in executive leadership workshops. By giving me space and showing restraint, they knew their chances of success would increase.

The Tactics: The girls developed a negotiation framework that would be taught in any C-suite development strategy session. They decided that their chances for success improved if they chose one item they could share. This created the perfect setup: working together, they softened me up with a collaborative decision. It wasn’t just about the toy—they were demonstrating teamwork and consideration, a pitch even the most hardened executive coach would appreciate.

Next, they identified the best lead negotiator, the one with the most emotional equity at the moment. Maybe one of them had made their bed without being asked or done something particularly kind for me that day. Whoever had built the most goodwill would make the pitch, practicing their argument with the others until they felt ready.

The Pitch: The lead negotiator would present their case with confidence, framing the ask in a way that assumed I would agree. This is a classic tactic in strategic leadership development—giving the decision-maker a sense of control by offering limited but desirable options. They knew the power of this approach. The first item they presented was always less desirable, making the second choice (the real target) seem like the obvious solution.

I often went through the reasons why I was saying "no" to the first option, thinking I was helping them understand decision-making. In reality, they were using the information to fine-tune their strategy for the next trip. They were gathering data, much like an executive in leadership transition coaching might, to improve their pitch the next time around.

The Close: The girls would circle back to their collaboration, reminding me how they had carefully chosen something they could all enjoy, considered its quality, and even picked an item on sale—hitting all the key points of a solid negotiation strategy. They reiterated the process, justified their choice, and emphasized why they deserved a "yes."

Every time, I fell for it. They closed the deal flawlessly. Now, looking back, I can see how they unconsciously applied the principles of innovative leadership strategies to their Target trips.

What I Learned: It turns out, negotiation skills for executives can be learned at any age. Paying attention to what’s happening around you—whether in a boardroom or a shopping aisle—helps you design or apply a winning approach in any situation. The people around us are getting what they want because they’ve learned the tactics that work. So why not us?

The best practices in executive decision-making teach that negotiations happen even when we’re not aware of them. Learning to anticipate these moves is a skill. Once you see negotiation strategies in action, you can’t unsee them. It becomes natural.

Conclusion: Whether you’re negotiating a major deal or making smaller decisions, the principles remain the same. As leaders, understanding how leverage and timing work can significantly improve outcomes. In executive leadership training programs and executive coaching services, we emphasize the importance of building these skills. You don’t have to be in a formal negotiation to apply them—they’re useful in everyday life.

What I learned from my girls is that negotiation is always happening. By refining your strategies and paying attention, you can achieve better results, both personally and professionally. Just like the high-potential leadership traits demonstrated in this story, taking the time to sharpen your skills can open new doors.

And if you ever run into my daughters, Trace, Morgan, or Jojo, on LinkedIn, be sure to ask them about the Target strategy—they’ve perfected it!