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“the first one who talks loses.”
Based on 30 years of executive experience, I realized that in addition to competency in one’s area of expertise, there are seven skills that rising leaders need to master for career success.
Feedback and growth are directly related. But all feedback is not equal. Sometimes you should make note of it so that you can hear it at the right time when you can take from it the most impactful insights for you.
Networking can be remarkably frustrating but it can also open doors, create connections, increase career confidence and provide insights for future career decisions.
like Driving on a Highway
It is Everywhere -
Always Leverage it
The Target Strategy
I wrote about the Target strategy in my book and I get people constantly commenting about how it helped them start to understand how negotiation happens even when you don’t know it. When you accept that leverage plays in every conversation, you unlock another dimension to consider.
Opt in First,
Figure it Out Later
As I look back on my career, the only regret is not opting in more often. Who knows the countless opportunities I missed just because I was not paying attention to what was happening around me.
How a Thank You Note can
Ruin your Weekend
I lifted this story from my book, The Art of Everyday Negotiation without Manipulation because it illustrates how easy and nuanced it is when we negotiate with ourselves.
Create Standing Room Only Meetings
Negotiation is essential for any leader, any professional, for us all. Negotiation, at its core, is finding common ground between people. It is not being afraid to offer different solutions, seeing the other person's perspective to find the best way to achieve outcomes even during stressful situations.
I was in a Vegas Show!
We are constantly uncovering new angles on the pandemic's silver linings. Who knew that random connection was something to miss or even need. The way we tactically handled the pandemic was the same, but the experience was unique for all of us. Even if random connection was not identified as a missing factor during the pandemic, when we experience it brings to light the importance.
As I think back on my experience of living my best self as a working parent, it felt messy. Sometimes incredible and other times stressful. Even the high points at those moments or working up to them didn’t feel that joyful. Instead, many times it was anxiety, fear, or trepidation. We imagine that it will be glorious, but not so much.
When you Score for the Other Team, you Never Forget
It seems like yesterday, even though it has been decades. It was the state semi-finals for our high school basketball team, and I was a senior. Since my sophomore year, I had been on Varsity, so I was one of the team's veterans. This was our first state championship so the gym was packed.
Don't be the Path of
The path of least resistance is not where your opportunities lie. I learned this lesson the hard way, but it taught me a lot. If you simply take what is given to you, you are teaching the people above you and around you that they don't need to anticipate your needs or response.
I Lost the ESPN Deal because
I didn't Ask for Help
When we remain objective and have trusted advisors around us, we can anticipate all possible moves for us or the other party. This is true in our everyday life. We can get triggered by a comment or be influenced by the relationship and miss an opportunity.
We plan, struggle, and progress but don't always notice. So looking back to see progress and recognize how far we have come is good. It can propel and catapult our development to the next level. Yet we don't appreciate the adjacent skills we sharpen as we go from conscious incompetence to unconscious competence.
Seriously, Thanks for the Feedback
Our blindspots are just that - blindspots. We are not able to see ourselves from another's perspective. Even if they provide abundant examples and feedback, we can only understand from our interpretation. So, it is a journey to understand, and it isn't about resolving the issue.
In our Torino station wagon going across country, my Dad would say, “Suffer in Silence.” As a kid I knew that meant to keep my complaints to myself, we are all hot, tired and thirsty. But who knew silence was such a power strategy? Thanks Dad!